Tiger Woods Holiday Poem (humor)


‘Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
Tiger Woods came a flyin’, chased by his spouse.

She wielded a nine iron and wasn’t too merry,                                                              Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.

He’d been cheatin’ on Elin, and the story progressed.                                                Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.

He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,                                                With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.

From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.

With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
When not in their pants, he was sendin’ them texts.

Despite all his cryin’ and beggin’ and pleadin’,
Tiger’s wife went investin’ — a new home in Sweden.

And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
“If you’re gettin’ laid then I’m gettin’ paid.”

She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
Her pre-nup made Christmas come early this year.

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4 Responses to “Tiger Woods Holiday Poem (humor)”

  1. Louie Feazell Says:

    I wanted to thank you for this nice write up. I surely liked every little part of it. I have you bookmarked and will be coming back.

  2. Habibullah Afridi Says:

    great!!!!!!

  3. bTiger Woods Holiday Poem (humor) « Lockdoc1#39;s Blog · Golf Courses Says:

    […] cris wrote an interesting post today. Here’s a quick excerpt‘Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house. Tiger Woods came a flyin’, chased by his spouse. She wielded a nine iron and wasn’t too merry, Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry. He’d been cheatin’ on Elin, … […]

  4. Tweets that mention Tiger Woods Holiday Poem (humor) « Lockdoc1's Blog -- Topsy.com Says:

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by John Donnelly, John Donnelly. John Donnelly said: Tiger Woods Holiday Poem (humor): http://wp.me/pyzuN-7J #tiger […]

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