Posts Tagged ‘TOOTHACHE’

Definitions that should be in the dictionary (humor)

March 14, 2010

ADULT
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR
A place where women curl up and dye.

CHICKENS
The only animal you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST
Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF
Cold Storage.

INFLATION
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO
An insect that makes you like flies better.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS

A doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

[Reportedly, the 2009 winning entry from an annual contest at Texas A&M University]

RAISIN
Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET
Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE

The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN
An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES
Something other people have.  I have character lines.


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